Girth of a Nation

We were wandering around Target last night — hey, Mondays are slow in Orlando — and they had some polo shirts on sale. Polo shirts are rapidly becoming my go-to wardrobe of late, which I’m sure means something as far as my aging process goes, but that’s beside the point.

So these shirts were on sale for $8 or some ridiculously low price. But of course, in small print underneath that price was “XXL sizes $2 more.”

It’s not secret than I am not a small man. I’m working on it, yeah, but even when I weighed less, I was never comfortable in really tight-fitting clothes. I like to have a little room to breathe. So these days, I generally wear XXL shirts. Fine, I’m fat, whatever.

And it’s ALWAYS $1 or $2 more for these size shirts, and doesn’t make a lick of sense. Is the amount of fabric required for the jump from XL to XXL so immense that the manufacturers will go out of business if they don’t charge that extra bit? Don’t they have a bunch of it left over from making smalls and mediums?

Come to think of it, why aren’t smalls and mediums $1 or $2 LESS than an XL? You’re telling me that it somehow costs the exact same amount to make shirts in sizes small all the way through XL, but it’s the XXL that crosses some invisible profitability barrier?

Besides, most of a shirt is the empty space where your body goes. I’m technically paying $2 extra for more air.

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